INFJ Depression: The Real Struggle of the Highly Sensitive
There’s nothing wrong with being an INFJ.
Last week, I published a post based on a person with whom I share a deep, soul connection and it’s still fresh in my mind right now. I had started on how the heightened emotional sensitivity in INFJs is strong enough to trigger depressive behavior and I will touch on it again in this article.
Again, What Is It Like to Be an INFJ?
Like I said before, these descriptions are primarily based on someone that I cherish a lot and to whom my heart calls out for. However, many INFJs can also relate to them as well.
“Let me be clear on a few things: INFJs are introverts, but that doesn’t make them anti-social or weirdos who don’t like other people. Their preference for alone time doesn’t restrict them from being ideal lovers. Their completely different understanding and perception of the world doesn’t mean they will run away from the real truth. They will never use their exceptional, intelligent abilities to exploit the weaknesses and insecurities of others.
Instead of being equal with bipolar, INFJs are sensitive, warm, emotional and also logic and reason-based personality types that can make devoted employees, friends and lovers.”
INFJs’ Struggle With Depression
#1. They Are Emotionally Exhausted From Taking on Other People’s Feelings
One of the most special abilities that INFJs possess is that they can understand people better than they understand themselves. They exist in a world where they can hear, loud and clear, others’ voices and can feel others’ emotions.
Call it a “superpower” or a psychic ability, but they don’t just sense the emotions of others but can also get soaked up and feel people’s feelings in their own bodies. The closer they are to a person, the more they will float in that maelstrom of emotions. If they walk into a room, they can instantly feel that strong negative vibe.
Now, from an emotional standpoint, this “magical ability” can leave them shaken for a long period of time. As they have too little control over it, they will feel emotionally exhausted to the point of an unconscious mini breakdown.
You may tell them, “Don’t even think or worry about others’ emotions,” but either way, the result, in the end, is the same and they will continue to feel what others feel because that’s what makes them who they are.
#2. You Overthink, Overthink and Overthink
INFJs can think, not just a little bit, but a lot more than an average person. And, they do take pride in this ability. However, there is not one such time their brain is put to rest and the interesting part is when that little voice inside gets out of control. That’s when their minds go in all directions at once and they come across several traffic jams.
If their overthinking were a sport, they would have been gold medalists.
But, what most INFJs fail to understand is that this overthinking can be extremely dangerous for their mental health. Caught in their thought loops, they will endlessly try to get a grip on things they cannot understand or try to connect dots together.
Trying to find more information in their brains. Remembering this. Thinking about that. And, they end up emotionally drained out.
Powerful mind or not, this ability can turn nasty and lead to nowhere.
But just as you cannot change the opinion or force an INFJ to believe in something they don’t want to, you cannot tell them to simply “stop thinking.”
Want to know the response of my INFJ inamorato? “Unfortunately, my brain doesn’t have a switch that could turn off that thought process.”
#3. You Crave For Meaning and Purpose
What I am talking about here is how most INFJs refuse to live and work like most common people, running into brick walls. I guess it all boils down to the classic case where INFJs are driven by meaning and purpose.
They believe they have been blessed with a life purpose, where they will use their super-intelligent and highly creative abilities to bring a change to the world. Unlike others who live life just for the sake of living or commit themselves to professions and personal endeavors, INFJs believe they have a destination to reach, a mission to accomplish and a journey to complete.
But when they are unsure, feel lost or when they’ve depleted all their energy in finding that purpose or meaning in life, they will start to run low and struggle with an unstable level of emotional distress.
#4. Conflict Can Stress You Out
I keep repeating to someone that no one loves conflicts, but they are unpreventable.
However, it seems that conflicts can get to INFJs on a deeper level, where everything can be read as acts of selfishness and negativity, which are regarded as a waste of time for INFJs.
They do not like chaos at all. They cannot hear and tolerate the voice of conflicts and disagreements. And, they feel hopeless and emotionally exhausted in the middle of such a negative environment.
#5. When Expectations Are Not Met
This might sound absurd to some, but INFJs can spend most of their time thinking about the future of humanity. You cannot stop them from setting expectations on people, but when these expectations are not met, disappointment starts creeping into their minds and hearts, creating that rejection for mankind in general.
These “abilities” can undoubtedly spin a person completely out of proportion and no wonder why many INFJs despise themselves for being their own worst enemy. However, if it was up to me alone, I would have said, the world feels like a much better place with INFJs. Despite how they can be easily expelled and distressed by their own energy and qualities, I’d say their principles and values make them pure, unique and unaffected by the external world.
Yet, another question comes back lurking in my mind: Can these good souls have a second side hiding behind some sort of curtain? Is there some evil root somewhere deep within these overly emotional people?