Numerous blogs talk about how to be happy in a relationship or how to deal with a break-up. Even when looking up information on unfaithfulness, it is mainly from the victim’s perspective. For instance, “how to know if your partner is cheating?” is one of the most recurrent articles on the subject. This article aims to take a different approach, and will determine why people nowadays are having trouble remaining faithful even though they love their partner.
Monogamy is the natural structure of a relationship for most people. It is the norm, but digging deeper, monogamy could have been instilled because most people are monogamous, but this does not mean that all people are meant to be monogamous. Let’s look at five reasons why you cannot stay faithful…
Why Do I Cheat?
I am not monogamous…
If you love your partner and cannot help but cheat, this means that this is your nature. You may think that I am crazy right now, but maybe you should go towards people who want to have a polygamous relationship.
You know about the expression “Once a cheater, always a cheater” I cannot accentuate this enough. It is not a remark or judgment, this is the truth, and some people have to accept it as part of their identity. I would even advise you to embrace it. Please do not lie to your partner; set the record straight so that you can talk about it openly.
Do not feel ashamed. You should be aware that a polygamous relationship is not for everyone. If your partner cannot deal with a polygamous relationship, this person is not meant for you. But be sure that if you force yourself into a monogamous relationship, one day or another, you will cheat because having only one partner is not your nature.
Okay, for this one, I feel you. Commitment issues are more common than we may think. We just don’t talk about it. Because who on earth is afraid of commitment? If you have had several failed relationships in the past, this is where your commitment issues may stem from.
Some may describe commitment issues as the phobia of relationships. Still, I would explain it as the fear of investing too much in a relationship that might fail, making you afraid to commit. If you are unsure if have commitment issues, let’s take a look at certain aspects that may give you a hint one way or another; you avoid thinking about the future of the relationship, your relationships do not last, or you avoid making plans with them. These are the core of commitment issues.
How to get rid of this state of mind, you may ask. It seems simple but let me tell you, this is the most challenging thing you will have to do. To overcome commitment issues, you need to trust. A lot of trust and communication is advisable in this situation. You may also want to try therapy; it will help.
Cheaters love their partners but hate themselves. It is primarily people who are insecure who will cheat in a relationship. The problem is not only the fact that they cheated, but it lies a lot deeper. Insecurity can lead people to do things in an attempt to feel validated. We may find this in old couples, where they want to feel desired as when they were younger, or people who were victims of body-shaming.
It is human nature. Humans love to be love, and this is a fact that in a relationship, communication is essential, it truly is. You need to communicate your insecurities to your partner and look for a solution together because keeping in mind that your insecurities may destroy your relationship.
Cheating is wrong, do not let yourself be fooled by the TV shows that are glorifying infidelity. Some people struggle with this, and some the act of cheating has destroyed thousands of happy families. In these times, it’s better to see if a problem is not lying deeper below the surface. Address the roots of the problem. Let us know in the comments below if you have any of these problems mentioned above.